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Laugh Center Got the greatest joke and you're just dying to tell us all? Put it here and watch the mayhem!

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Old 11-12-2005, 02:43 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Wink Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

An Australian man was having coffee and croissants with butter and jam in a cafe when an American tourist, chewing gum, sat down next to him.

The Australian politely ignored the American, who, nevertheless, started up a conversation.

The American snapped his gum and said, "You Australian folk eat the whole bread?"

The Australian frowned, annoyed with being bothered during his breakfast, and replied, "Of course."

The American blew a huge bubble. "We don't. In the States, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle them, transform them into croissants and sell them to Australia."

The American had a smirk on his face.
The Australian listened in silence.

The American persisted. "D'ya eat jam with the bread?"
Sighing, the Australian replied, "Of course."

Cracking his gum between his teeth, the American said, "We don't. In the States, we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and sell it to Australia."

The Australian then asked, "Do you have sex in the States?" The American smiled and said, "Why of course we do."

The Australian leaned closer to him and asked, "And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?"

"We throw them away, of course."

Now it was the Australian's turn to smile. "We don't. In Australia, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum and sell them to the United States."


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Old 11-12-2005, 05:40 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

Hee hee
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Old 11-12-2005, 12:53 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

Yikes!
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Old 11-12-2005, 01:10 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

1. I eat the whole bread. The crust is the best part.

2. Americans eat fresh fruit for breakfast? What Americans are these? Because I have three jars of jelly/preserves/marmalade/whatever in my refrigerator.

3. I don't know what Fuss is laughing about. He's always telling us how he doesn't get any so I know he hasn't contributed to my chewing gum in a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong time.
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Old 11-12-2005, 02:33 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

Ewwww.
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Old 11-12-2005, 06:13 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

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Originally Posted by NewRomantic
3. I don't know what Fuss is laughing about. He's always telling us how he doesn't get any so I know he hasn't contributed to my chewing gum in a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong time.
Ooh sticks and stones Liar liar pants on fire

I don't say I don't get any, I say that what I get's no good It's a fine line diff !

Wouldn't matter no how anyway, after my second child I got the chop. By a guy who went on to win $ 500,000 on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire

End result, no more freakin' condoms (for your chewing gum), I hate the goddamn things. "No loss of sensitivity" BS You may as well have a numbing injection

Here is a pic of the dude. It's the only time I ever saw him smile. His surname is "Sauer". By name and by nature
Attached Images
File Type: jpg VC_WWTBAM_AUS_20000900_01_TrevorSauer.jpg (20.3 KB, 36 views)
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Old 11-13-2005, 11:44 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

You let that guy touch your little mangod? You're brave. He looks like the kind of fellow that might collect the leftover pieces in jars.

Last edited by NewRomantic; 11-13-2005 at 02:21 PM..
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Old 11-13-2005, 12:08 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's



But LMAO at NewRo..
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Old 11-13-2005, 09:41 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

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Originally Posted by NewRomantic
You let that guy touch your little mangod? You're brave. He looks like the kind of fellow that might collect the leftover pieces in jars.
Yes ! With the accent on little

The worst part was the numbing injections. If you think you hate needles, just think of getting one THERE

When he said "Hold still now" all I could think was "Well bloody obviously hey ?"
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Old 11-13-2005, 10:12 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

Pish. Ive given birth to 3 kids...and been stitched up down there 3 times. Needles in that region are a breeze.....


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Old 11-14-2005, 01:44 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

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Originally Posted by PaperGirl
Pish. Ive given birth to 3 kids...and been stitched up down there 3 times. Needles in that region are a breeze.....


I think I speak for most females when I say that we aren't adverse to the odd 'injection' down there
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Old 11-14-2005, 02:06 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

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I think I speak for most females when I say that we aren't adverse to the odd 'injection' down there
huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh
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Old 11-14-2005, 02:58 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

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I think I speak for most females when I say that we aren't adverse to the odd 'injection' down there

Well now, I guess that depends on the size of the "needle" now, huh?
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Old 11-15-2005, 01:52 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Re: Why do you think it's called Wrigley's

Quote:
Originally Posted by mooster
I think I speak for most females when I say that we aren't adverse to the odd 'injection' down there
Anyone for a bit of Alison Moyet ?

Show me one direction
I will not question again
For a warm injection
Is all I need to calm the pain

We all need a love resurrection
Just a little divine intervention
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